Hurt People Hurt People

Have you ever wondered how some people manage to always make other people wrong and miserable and they don't seem to care about it. These people can say unpalatable things without even thinking how the next person would feel.

It is important to know that the world view of these people is limited, they cannot see beyond their perceptions. They see the problem being out there, in the next person and not with themselves. When there is a problem, it is always someone else, they never take responsibility. These people struggle to see and comprehend a different view point. You can never convince them otherwise.

People like these are deeply wounded, they carry a lot of hurt. Most if not all of this hurt comes from their early childhood. They have never processed the events that transpired in their early lives. They are not aware that there is a problem and therefore do not even have a clue to what is happening in their lives. They are unconscious of their actions and therefore act out of habit. It is how and what they presumably know themselves to be . They do not know any better. Internally they have a war fare going on and when they feel attacked they spit fire because they think they need to protect themselves. They are troubled and burdened and this is what they project to the world. The pain of their burden and trouble is too much for them to bear and therefore unconsciously they seek others to share this with them. The hurt and pain that they feel is what they know and are familiar with. They will unconsciously seek to share it with others. What else can they share, we only share what we have.

Having a mature conversation with them is a waist of time. You cannot change anybody except yourself. People change because they want to, not because you want them to change. Change is an internal job, you first have to realise that there is a problem. This is work and not a lot of people are willing to put in the effort. It is an effort because the effort must be applied multiple of times. Repetition is the key to success, that is how a habit is installed. This requires time, introspection and taking responsibility for your actions. It is a conscious decision, it does not happen automatically. This is foreign and hard for a lot of people. It is at this point that a lot of people who are not willing to put in the effort use the phrase "the devil you know is better than the devil you do not know". It is easier to do what you are used to than to change and do new and unfamiliar things. The new and unfamiliar is uncomfortable and scary because there are no guarantees.

How can you change something that you think is ok, you can't. Stop giving them your airtime, they don't deserve it. When you don't indulge them with your energy, they will move to the next target. These are Hurt People who Hurt people. Hurting is what they know and therefore they are only giving from the abundance of their hearts. They are acting from an unconscious state of being. They need help but they have to come to the realisation on their own, that all is not well and that they need help. Let us stop thinking that what we know is the best thing and or that we can change other people to what we want them to be. We all view life from our own unique perspective, and our perspective is controlled by the beliefs that are running our lives. You have to be willing to go deed and investigate your beliefs. Change is an individual, personal thing, it happens from inside out. All of us are wounded in one way or another and we all need to introspect and deal with our wounds so we can heal and become better versions of ourselves.